Holy Spirit of Jesus, help me not fear but only believe…

Mark 5: 21 - 43
Once when I was out of work, my children and I arrived home on the last breath of gas in our van.  With no money in the bank and no food in the fridge, I had been denied EI and was struggling through a workless summer as a teacher.  I was afraid.
 
Mark tells a similar story: The leader of a synagogue, Jarius, and his wife had every logical reason to be afraid. Their 12 yr old was bedridden and very sick, and nothing seemed to help – no normal remedies worked- and while he was fetching Jesus, the girl’s Mom and those supporting her noticed that the child had stopped breathing and was getting cold with death. But when Jesus arrived on the scene, the parents had two options – to live into their fears or to “only” believe. They chose to believe and follow Jesus to their daughter’s bedside. Within minutes their girl was alive again, and walking around.   
 
It was my 15 year old daughter, who noticed my anguish and said, “Mom, God’s got this, you know!” Yes, I knew that, but I had needed to hear the call of Christ to believe. Within minutes, the kids found an unusual letter in the mail, a cheque from my sister’s father in law half a country away. That day I learned again to ‘only’ believe, and to spend no time or energy on the black hole of fear.  
 
My life, our lives, are full of fears – fears of losing our memory, abilities, or physical strength; worries about financial stability or life style comfort; fears of attack on family, friends or fame, or anxieties about changes or charges or chastisements. When I note fears encroaching on my well-being, will I turn to “face my fears” or will I turn my face and my footsteps towards Jesus and ONLY believe?  Holy Spirit of Jesus, help me to not fear, but only believe.
 
Let me know again the joy of your help; with a spirit of fervor sustain me.    (Psalm 51:12)
 
GRANT ME, O Lord my God, a mind to know you, a heart to seek you, wisdom to find you, conduct pleasing to you, faithful perseverance in waiting for you, and a hope
of finally embracing you.
St. Thomas Aquinas
 
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